Interesting...

..what plays on my DVD player, will not play on my DVD-ROM, and what plays on my DVD-ROM will not play on my DVD player. Oh, the irony.

I just want to finish an episode, brush my teeth, and go to bed without crapping here in my blog.

I could really use a wish right now.

Maybe I should record today yesterday down.

Had lunch with my group of high school friends :)

So we had two couples there and..
apparently the girls are the men, and the guys are the women.

Another irony.
So I said 'Maybe I should find myself a lady too'.

San: Yes please do find yourself a lady!
Me: Ok :)
San: I mean, please find yourself a boyfriend, please don't find yourself a real lady.
Me: ...
San: Seriously, please don't find yourself a lady.

.......................................................

Now it's tempting to be a lesbian.

I could do with the reactions of my friends thinking "Why, Yin Mei, WHY!?".
Amusing... and it's not like I don't have the base of a lesbian already, having seen several similar reactions that has once affected me greatly.

But I suppose it wouldn't be valid since I have said that all in this public blog, coupled with the fact that I might put this post up on Facebook.

Anyway: Resolution Jan 2011:

1. Stop talking with Sheldon aftertaste.
2. Don't buy food in uni. Heck, don't buy anything for this month.

Next!

A comment.
Nico, I don't know if it's the connection, but I hope it's not so that I can say:
you are a lousy conversation keeper. I need social interaction!

Next!

I like how I have less hair to wash now... although Bing says that I now look like a boy. Hmm.. maybe that's what prompted San's comment.

Next!

I am not crapping, you know.

Next!

Starting Tuesday, I have to keep a log on my food intake. Interesting, but hassling. Hassling but interesting.

Next!

I'll end this post with a song I think that should be posted at least once in each of my blogs. I really love this song. It's emo. Haha, or I'll just say.. I relate with the song. I haven't listened to this song in a while, because sometimes it makes me think about how it reminds me of things, but tonight.. tonight I just want to blog about it.

nobody knows who I really am
I never felt this empty before
and if I ever need someone to come along
who's gonna comfort me
and keep me strong
we are all rowing the boat of fate
the waves keep on coming and we can't escape
but if we ever get lost on our way
the waves will guide you through another day
遠くで息をしてる　透明になったみたい far away, I breathe, as if I was transparent
暗闇に思えたけど　目隠しされてただけ it seemed that I am in the dark, but I was only blindfolded
祈りをささげて　新しい日を待つ I offer a prayer, awaiting a new day
鮮やかに　光る海　その果てまで when sunlight would shine vividly upon the ends of the ocean
nobody knows who I really am
maybe they just don't give a damn
but if I ever need someone to come along
I know you would follow me,
and keep me strong
人の心はうつりゆく　抜け出したくなる people's heart change, and I want to slip out
つきはまた新しい周期で　舟を連れてく and the moon, in its new cycle, will once again guide the boats of fate
and every time I see your face
the oceans heave up to my heart
you make me wanna strain at the oars
and soon I can see the shore
when will I see the shore
I want you to know who I really am
I never thought I'll feel this way towards you
and if you ever need someone to come along
I will follow you
and keep you strong
旅はまだ続いてく　穏やかな日も the journey will continue, even during calm days
つきはまた新しい周期で　舟を照らし出す and the moon, in its new cycle, will once again shine upon the boats of fate
祈りをささげて　新しい日を待つ I give my prayers, awaiting a new day
鮮やかに　光る海　その果てまで when sunlight would shine vividly upon the ends of the ocean
運命の船を漕ぎ　波は次から次へと私たちを襲うけど we are rowing boats of fate, and the waves will continuously attack us
それも素敵な旅ね　どれも素敵な旅ね but it's also a wonderful journey; they are all wonderful journeys

\\.//

1.Credits to Mel for introducing me to The Big Bang Theory.. :D

2. It's cute how.. I have observations upon the two continuums... and maybe I would slowly realize something :)

3. Wow, I just realized that my sister's birthday this year.. the date is cute. 20.11.2011 XD

4. Upon me are 139 people playing like crazy, and being the 140th, I'm just lazy.

5. 我辦不到 你辦不到 乾脆不要 乾脆就拉拉拉拉 倒 ;)

6. I finished my shopping today! :D

7. Green, red and purple. Less white and yellow. What do you get?

Nonsense

1. I am in need of serotonin!!
2. I'm having a headache.
3. I'm not studying.
4. My dad gave me a planner.
5. So what do I do with my Starbucks planner?
6. Anyone of you want it?
7. Could make a good Christmas present though.
8. I look at my collection of Harry Potter series and feel the urge to read them. I think I'll enjoy them more than my Ethics textbook.
9. I studied more than usual today! *proud* thanks to Maple.
10. Maybe that's where the headache is coming from.
11. I am supposed to be fasting today.
12. But I didn't.
13. Guess I don't ____ you that much.
14. I am listening to Liu Liyang's Gift.
15. Emo song.
16. But nais.
17. Do you know?
18. Of course you don't.
19. It's just my way of speech.
20. Anyways, my point.
21. I wear a cap when I study.
22. Long fringe.
23. It wasn't funny.
24. It's not funny!
25. Until my brother came into my room and said "Ah Girl 好心你讀書就不要戴祿帽啦".
26. Sial. I didn't realize it's green.
27. But it's a nice cap ok!
28. I didn't get to see Rui Rui today ):
29. Headache's gettin' to me.
30. Tear glands are working (no, it doesn't mean I'm crying, it just means they're functioning).
31. I look at my study table. Disastrous.
32. I look at my bed. Horrendous.
33. No, it's clean. I just changed the bedsheet a few days ago okay! It's just untidy.
34. Headache's really bad.
35. Sleepy too.
36. Three more chapters! Four more subjects!
37. PSY201 - Very important!
38. PSY308 - Important elective! I love criminal minds :D
39. PSY304 - Oh boy oh boy! The structured question just scares the shit outta me.
40. PSY33--.......... *ahem, allow me to say...* wtf who cares.
41. I should just shut up and resume my studying.
42. I should make myself proud by managing to study everything this time round.
43. One of the lessons by tofu - when procrastinating from studies, remind self of self's lousy CGPA.
44. ........
45. Baa baiii!!!!!!

Diarrhea

I wanna have one. A diarrhea of words.

But these days it's been a constipation.
But it's all good.

What I have is time.

Yeah. I suppose.

So even if I said I'm constipating,
you'll still end up reading (perhaps) alot because I spent a few hours here,
just going on, and on,
and on and on and on.

Heck, I can even just type and on and on and on and on forever.

But I won't.
Cuz you'll just skip the whole post then.
You'll do a huge saccade jump until I end the part where I say and on,
and your brain will work again only when the words are other than "and on".

Oh my.
So proud to be a Cognitive student.

I only know all the .. manifest stuff.
Nothing latent.

Oh what did I want to say?

Oh yeah!

Dear tofu,

Are you coming to stay over before you fly to Australia? Haha.

Ok, next.

Dear Mel,

Are you watching yet another sunset?
Please sleep, will ya?
One of the possible causes of death is lack of sleep.
Erm.. yeah, you should tell that to Jen too.. mm hmm.

..and you know what?
I've been drinking Starbucks these days.
For the stamps.
For Peppermint Mocha.
I love that drink.
It's just too good.

I've been sleeping at 5am in the past few days.
Some people compliment me,
some are surprised,
some are concerned,
some don't know,
some don't care.

But it's okay.
It's all a chain reaction.
After all, I brought this upon myself.
It all started with me failing my Research Methods.
The one thing good about it is,
I'm probably a tad bit more concerned about my grades now.
Like on a previous scale of... 0.9/5.0,
now it's... 2.5/5.0
It's quite a hike don't you think!

..and I'm currently listening to Angels Cry by Mariah Carey ft. Ne Yo.
I'm tired, and not tired of this song.
No idea why.
The point is I'm still repeating it on my WMP over and over again.

Oh right,
went out with Moon :)
After the Matterhorn dinner..
we went over to Starbucks and sat for about..
one to two hours..
and we just talked and talked and talked.
Mostly me bitching.. about I guess, everything around me.
So good to have a listener (:

Speaking of which,
do you know my love language?
It is care.
..which is probably why my love language in terms of the five determined by.. don't remember his name, is Quality Time.
It's the closest to care.
When you spend quality time together, you're investing time for each other.
Somehow, that's one form of care.
Letting me care for you makes me feel loved too.
Accepting my care makes me feel loved.

What I least need, and abhor is hypocrisy.
...and somehow I feel that.

Anyway,
I shouldn't be dwelling on these right now.

More priorities.

Like striking the 201 Lab Report on my self-actualization post,
and ...

stuff.

11.53pm.
I wanted to post: I want to cry.
But no,
other than (maybe) feeling better,
crying doesn't do a thing.
Why do I need to cry before I work?
Why not just work?
A new triangle for my self-actualization (you envision it la k):

201 Lab Report.
Her part.
Waiting for her part.
Her part.
Vroom vroom.
Sleep.
Headache.
My part.

After vroom vroom,
the four parts above will actually be striked,
because it's just my part, my part, my part, and my part.

Ok, now I need to be prepared.

Do You See What I See?

Today on Twitter I spotted one meaningful twit retweeted.

It's by the Dalai Lama.

"I believe that whether a person follows any religion or not is unimportant, he or she must have a good heart, a warm heart."

..and I know that I should follow his tweets.

I don't know how, but somehow I feel peace,
like I can be saved as long as I read his words; having a good, warm heart is most important.

..because I've always been narrow-minded, and I believe his words will broaden my horizons.

Here are the few I find especially meaningful, if not to you, to me at the very most.

"We need to make a concerted effort to develop compassion; we must use all the events in our daily life to transform out thoughts & behavior."

"If you use violence, you may get some temporary satisfaction. But the nature of violence is unpredictable - unexpected results often happen."

"Anger may bring extra energy, but it eclipses the best part of our brain: its rationality. The energy of anger is almost always unreliable."

Yes. I keep forgetting that too. That violence, anger, aggression: they all bring nothing but pain, nothing but more problems, nothing close to solutions.

"Irrespective of doctrinal and other differences, all major world religions are concerned with helping individuals become good human beings."

I love this, and I whole-heartedly agree.

"Living a truly ethical life, putting the needs of others first and providing for their happiness, has tremendous implications for society."

So you see, it's not stupid ;)

"A compassionate person creates a warm, relaxed atmosphere of welcome and understanding around him."

I want this. I want to be able to achieve this naturally.

"The most important benefit of patience consists in the way it acts as a powerful antidote to the affliction of anger."

"The important thing is that our day-to-day life should be meaningful, that our attitude should be positive, happy and warm."

I don't know why, but this reminds me of the message from God that the Facebook application gave me.

As of now, I'm trying to maintain positive, but I'm still tired and worn out.
I believe that I shouldn't rest until I've completed my work, that I don't deserve rest until I do. But no, it's not true. Today, I felt terrible. I lacked sleep, and I lacked patience whilst talking with my grandmother. I lacked rest, and now my back aches. All this contribute to the lack of health, and now my performance is staggered.

A few hours ago, I found the message to be a temptation instead of a word of advice. Now I believe, yes, I should sleep, because in a way, God's saying; I should take care of myself before I take care of my priorities. Because, it is me, myself and I who will be taking care of my priorities. So as I get peace, and have enough rest, I will be good and set to do more.

That's the whole point.

"Once our mind is more calm and joyful, then our activities can be more effective."

(:

"When tragedy or misfortune comes our way, if we can shift our focus away from self and toward others, we experience a freeing effect."

"Genuine friends come only on the basis of warm-heartedness."

..which is why I love all my friends (:
You're all real,
and sometimes I feel not on par.
Although that could just be my lack of self-esteem self speaking.

"Loving thoughts and actions are clearly beneficial for our physical and mental health."

"More often than not, anger is actually an indication of weakness rather than of strength."

I'm weak.
But trying to be stronger (:

"The more we care for the happiness of others, the greater our own sense of well being becomes."

I'll end with this =)

Good night.

Dear November...

I'm so scared of you I want to go into hibernation.

But fear will bring me nowhere.
So I shall conquer you,
beat the challenge,
get the great satisfaction,
muka tembok dan memalukan diri di colloquium sekali lagi,
make my friends happy,
give myself a peace of mind..
and finally when it's all over,
faint on bed
and diesleep.

:D

I hope I can.
I think I can.
I can I can I can I can I can I can I can I can I can I can I can I can I can I can.

Hello guys..
ya all can too.
and when you do,
and if my pace slows down..
please give me a hand,
and let me reach out to you :D
cuz I don't know about you, but I'll be very happy if we can all do this together.
I mean, it's cool to do everything alone.
But it's more fun and touching to do things together.

Ok. Brain fuzzy, ..
erm, I mean,
mind fuzzy, brain slow.
Offing the lights and turning it back on when I wake up.
Good night, my beloved clique! :D

"I was thinking about you.
I wanted you to have this.
I love you."

Hahaha.

So cool.

Gifts communicate love.

=)

Then I feel very much loved last week.

It's still quality time though.
Nothing beats spending time together,
talking, getting to know,
and understanding each other =)

I Don't Wanna Miss A Thing

If you love me,
give up on trying to leave me.
If you truly love me,
you will accept me no matter who I am
what I do
how I behave.
I'm so comfortable now,
if you love me,
let me stay in my comfort zone until it ends.
I'm so comfortable now,
if you love me,
hold hands with me and I will accompany you,
defend your everything
with my all
until my last.
If you truly love me,
you would realize you're making me look like the bully
when I'm the one that wants to cry.
You're so cute and fluffy...
to make matters worst you're warm.
It feels so good you make me wanna sleep.
Good night!